Moving through all the sludge, all the burdens and weights. Freeing myself from the things I knew to be have evolved, they have moved on. A letter to my friend.
2 more syndromes Mikey. What do I do with this? I know you have no answers. I don't even know how to handle it. I know you know what it's like to deal with things so far beyond your reach and control. It's not like I can put on a diaper and know that for a few moments, I will have relief or have comfort. It's unending. It's needling at me, into a place where it's very dark. I don't want to reach out to hurt someone, but I fear the worst will come from me soon if I can't get it under control.
Syndromes are terrible monsters, they have no morals, no obligations, they do as they please. They come and go. But they live with me forever.
How can I make these positives?
I am as a confused person in a circular cell with no opening, forced to walk walls that I never wanted to feel.
IS THIS MY PUNISHMENT FOR THE LIFE I AM DISSOLVING? Fine, I will take it. Accountability for sins will not go unpunished. Suffering for both will absolve one. If the apology will not come, both will be harmed, yet one destroyed. I will feel the suffering, the burning, the pain, but I will live on. I would rather live a full life as a shell than a partial as one of a hypocritical fake and liar; one who feeds on the innocent trust of those who will believe anything.
2 more syndromes Mikey. What do I do with this? I know you have no answers. I don't even know how to handle it. I know you know what it's like to deal with things so far beyond your reach and control. It's not like I can put on a diaper and know that for a few moments, I will have relief or have comfort. It's unending. It's needling at me, into a place where it's very dark. I don't want to reach out to hurt someone, but I fear the worst will come from me soon if I can't get it under control.
Syndromes are terrible monsters, they have no morals, no obligations, they do as they please. They come and go. But they live with me forever.
How can I make these positives?
I am as a confused person in a circular cell with no opening, forced to walk walls that I never wanted to feel.
IS THIS MY PUNISHMENT FOR THE LIFE I AM DISSOLVING? Fine, I will take it. Accountability for sins will not go unpunished. Suffering for both will absolve one. If the apology will not come, both will be harmed, yet one destroyed. I will feel the suffering, the burning, the pain, but I will live on. I would rather live a full life as a shell than a partial as one of a hypocritical fake and liar; one who feeds on the innocent trust of those who will believe anything.
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