Ugh

I don't know where to start.

Doors I pryed open are closing again. Anguish, rage, hostility, all my old friends I had put aside in order to attempt to lead a normal human life are coming back. I feel the currents stirring in myself, and all I want is for them to stop.

I am wounded deeply, and do not know how to fix this. I do not wish to stop caring, stop loving, stop feeling. These things feel like a toxin, though. They bring me to agony. I cannot push them away, however, I do not know how to manage or work with them either. If I push them away, I also push away people who care for and love me. Again.

I need to sit in silence and let the Lord of Time guide my thoughts and actions, for I cannot do this alone.